Best Quote I Heard All Day
Good morning! What we have in mind is breakfast in bed for four hundred thousand. --Wavy Gravy

We went to Woodstock and we have returned.

(Of course, you know that the Woodstock Festival was actually held in Bethel, NY.)

There's nothing better than a road trip with my beloved Kathy Merrick. Now that I think of it, the two of us in a car talking for two hours straight would be pretty frightening to normal people.
Off we go on Friday to Selma the Axe Murderess's house in Woodstock for a great weekend filled with yarn, incredible cooking by Selma's Stewart, talk, more yarn. It was such a Wolvie weekend, even though we were missing two-thirds of the crew. So here's a few of the weekend highlights:

If you have an opportunity to visit Morehouse Farm's retail shop when you go to Rhinebeck or if you're in the area, do it. One of the most beautiful yarn shops I have ever visited and the yarn is outrageous.

Note Kathy's incredible scarf made from Lantern Moon sari silk.

Selma knits while Mar and Kathy root through the yarn bins

No one chooses colors like Kathy

Selma, Stewart, Kathy and Colly Sible the Bondage Maiden

One of these days someone will take a decent picture of Merrick. Perhaps Franklin. I never seem to be able to keep her from distorting her lovely features.

I managed to get a few ends sewn in and some I-cord knitted for the hoodie. Didn't even dare work on the Melanie because I would have been too distracted. So I bought a simple scarf kit at Morehouse, your basic Old Shale done in one of their great dyed merinos, just so I could have something mindless to knit while we chatted at Selma's kitchen table. As of last night, I had gotten quite a bit done.

While watching Selma finish knitting a really nice but simple pullover for Stewart, a Cabin Fever design called Ridgeway-Lite, I realized that not only do I not own any simple, comfy sweater to wear around with jeans but I will need something simple to knit in between bouts of the Melanie shawl.

Simple does not necessarily equate with "make it in a weekend." At least, not in my book. However, I do like to knit simple garments that drape properly and suit my purposes. Selma turned me onto this Morehouse design, which is elegantly simple.

This design is not yet on their website, so I guess it's pretty new. I tried it on at the shop and really liked the drape and the comfort factor. However, sage is not my color so I bought Aubergine.

And then, since I can never pass up their laceweight, I bought some for a scarf of my own design to be determined.

Now I swear to God I'm done with yarn/fiber purchases until Rhinebeck in October. Hear that, Loop? I've said it in public. You need to do the same in the Comments. We're finished. Done. Over. No more buying of anything fiber related. Only completed projects.

(However, after reading about the Excellent Dyeing Adventures of Carol & Ted, I would so much like to do some myself. That activity is not on the horizon, though.)

Many thanks to Selma and Stewart for such a rare and handy weekend. I will never forget Stewart's Brussels sprouts. Never. What a guy.

Best Quote I Heard All Day
As long as I sit in this chair, all future catastrophes will be planned by me.--George W. Bush

Now my knitting, spinning and weaving calendar for the year 2006 is finally filled up, and I'm rested and ready.

Looks like 2006 will be the year of lace, at least for knitting.

Knit Some Shit
I'm quite out of my mind. These projects are enough to make me question my stability. However, with one 2006 knitting project, the JamaicanMeCrayzee, already finished, I have my hopes for a productive year.

Major league projects:

• The Melanie Shawl

• The Wedding Ring Shawl

Minor league projects:

• Self-designed shawl in Debbie Bliss Alpaca Silk DK in the color below:
• Various pairs of socks from stash yarn

The Wedding Ring shawl, which I have just gotten from Heirloom Knitting, is an amazing pattern. Fifteen pages. And Sharon Miller includes samples of the yarn that may be used for the shawl, enough of each to knit a small swatch.

I might add that the Wedding Ring shawl is a limited edition of 500, so if you want it, you'd better get it. Sharon has already sold nearly half of them. I missed out on the Princess shawl and I was damned if I was going to miss this one. She'll reprint it in 2010. I'm not waiting until I'm 60.

I will be knitting this along with three other people. I'll let them expose themselves, as it were. This will NOT be a public knitalong. However, I'm sure three of the four of us will write about it. And it certainly will not be finished in 2006, since we don't expect to begin it before the summer.

Spin Some Shit
I have three spinning options: the Schacht, the Joy and my Comet handspindle. There's something planned for each.

The Schacht
With Starry Night almost spun up, it's time to plan for more. I have two other big bags of fiber from Tintagel Farm, bought at Rhinebeck last year (unfortunately, they have no web site, yet), so I had to pick one.

This will take the entire year to spin and ply, as did the Starry Night. I have no name for this one yet. Nothing on the bag, nothing in my head. Feel free to suggest. I have to have some tag for it when I write about it.

The Joy
Remember this bombyx silk from my shopping trip with Joe in December? That's next for the Joy. I use the Joy for small projects and sampling, primarily. So there will be other small projects for the Joy, as yet undetermined, once the bombyx is spun.

The Comet
Right now I have some generic blue wool that I'm handspindling. Once I'm done playing with that, I will switch the Cormo from the Joy onto the handspindle. There's plenty of the Cormo for laceweight, God knows.

Weave Some Shit
Since I'm such a rank beginner, I'm barely able to plan projects yet. However, I have two already in my head.

• Dishtowels in 8/2 cotton that I bought at WEBS in November

I need to get these on the warping board SOON.

• The 10/2 perle cotton color gamp huck lace sampler that I got last summer, before the loom.

I think I may do this as a baby blanket. Because you never know when you might become a grandmother again, particularly since Corinne and Mike would like to have a child together.

And I'm sure there will be more weaving projects this year.

Now, is that enough shit or what?

I grant you, I'm not as prolific as some people. But then, it's quality and learning opportunities that count, not how many schmattehs you can churn out.

And by the way, for those who did not read the Comments from the last entry all the way through, the answer to the mystery spots was: WD40. Valerie got it right first.

Now it's time to get some writing done on the book--it's coming along very well and Franklin has done some wonderful sketches. However, I'll be glad when it's over. Next book? The Joy of Sox, to be published late 2007 or early 2008. The Diamusee sock is the first design, I think.

A rare and handy weekend begins tomorrow, when Kathy and I go to see Selma the Axe Murderess up in Woodstock. I'm taking the camera. Forewarned is forearmed, girlillas.

Best Quote I Heard All Day
Mystery is the wisdom of blockheads--Horace Walpole

Mayhem in the sleepy quasi-historic village of Mine Hill, nestled in the foothills of the Appalachians--can it be solved?

Bring out the big guns. After all, this was a crime that surpassed outrage. A heinous deed that boggled the mind and begged the question, "What the FUCK happened here?"

Could it be Buddy the Bodacious Cat, spewing and spraying because his bowl was empty? Or perhaps John re-enacting one of his idol Frank Zappa's songs? Ectoplasm from my late husband, who appears in dreams saying, "Do you really need more yarn, honey?"?

The mystery was solved using Luminol and other advanced forensic techniques such as ballistics and trajectory calculations.

It was fiber related, no question about it. You're so fucking smart, all of you, and now you have the opportunity to prove it. What left this odd, liquid patterning on my living room wall?

JamaicanMeCrayzee--The Penultimate Act
So it is has been written, so it shall be done. I finished knitting the hood last night. A minor roadblock had arisen and was handled fortuitously. More on that later. But first, here's the teen-age funkster modeling her new hoodie.

It was all I could do to keep from calling her "my little Rasta elf."

Here's what I should have known in advance, because I absolutely knew it, and here's what I forgot about ribbing. If you knit 1/1 ribbing vertically, next to stockinette, the purl stitch positioned next to the stockinette acts as a turning stitch and the whole ribbed band will flip to the inside. Duh.

After about two inches of knitting the hood, I was reminded of this. But never mind. Since I had added the ribbing by casting on 5 extra stitches at the beginning and the end of the hood edge, the ribbing then could be used either as a facing or a casing, depending on whether Liz wanted a drawstring or not. So all was salvaged.

Except that she wants a drawstring. So now I have to knit about 3 feet of I-cord, weave in the rest of the ends, wash/block the whole sweater, and then it will be done and ready for the photographs that will go into the pattern sheets. And start sizing the directions so that people other than a size 1 can make it.

Weekend Roundup
I managed to get the hood knitted despite a slight flare-up of my CTS. This CTS originates not from knitting, according to my neurosurgeon, but from mousing for more than 20 years. Clicking and dragging, primarily. So I find spinning easy on my right hand, which holds the fiber. The huge pile of Starry Night has melted into this:

The label on the bag says "230 yds." It dawned on me the other day that 230 yards meant 230 yards of fucking roving. Holy shit. Good thing I didn't figure that out ahead of time. So I plan on starting to swatch Starry Night some time next weekend, while I'm hanging out with Kathy and Selma.

Read This Book Or I'll Shoot This Dog
Anyone who's worked in magazine publishing knows this famous coverline. So here's a book for you all to read or I'll shoot your puppy. I got my copy on Thursday and couldn't put it down.

An astonishing book and one that certainly opened my eyes. You all know Lisa, my dear friend and frequent rabblerouser in my comments. Well, this book was written by her partner, Norah Vincent. Norah spent 18 months posing as "Ned," a swell guy but a lousy bowler, who always seemed to have a bit of a 5 o' clock shadow issue. Ned spent time not only bowling but in strip joints, going out on internet dates (anyone who's done that deal, as I have, will find this chapter most interesting), in a monastery, and even attending a male retreat. Now that takes balls, even if they come pre-packaged. And what Norah discovered about men is revolutionary, in my opinion.

This book just blew me away, shattering a ton of my conceptions about men and how they think and why they think what they do. I grew up in the Gloria Steinem era. I remember when Ms. Magazine launched. I'm a feminist from way back, although I do loves the guys very much and never was interested in bashing them. However, I, as so many women do, had preconceived ideas about men. Read the book with an open mind. And then be prepared to change yours.

(Never mind that I would always support a friend's efforts. I would. However, I sure as shit wouldn't put something on my blog flogging said effort if it weren't completely up to my skanky standards, no matter how good a friend.)

Norah was on 20/20 this past Friday and on Good Morning America this morning. And the Today Show tomorrow morning. A People magazine spread is coming. Her website has all the info for future appearances.

I was thinking that Norah's upcoming appearance on the Conan O'Brien show is almost as rare and handy as her maybe making it to Letterman. Read the book.