Best Quote I Heard All Day
She wears her clothes as if they are thrown on with a pitchfork--Jonathan Swift

It is with no sadness that I will be missing Stitches East in Baltimore this year. This is the first time in years that I am not bothering to go.

I will miss all those pitch-forked schmattehs on the backs of the attendees. But since photography is banned now and I can no longer do the Gallery of Ghastlies, I'm happy to leave it to you to peruse Knitter's for some of the best fuglies around.

Except, of course, this one, which I found somewhere on the internet:

Hey, kids! Do you love modular knitting AND fashion glitz crap? And pink? Then you'll love this one.

It's rash-making.

Rhinebeckons
Thanks, everyone, for all your kind get-well wishes and congrats on the new job. I am so finished with the Slovenians at this point. The new/old job just landed in my lap, despite an interview during my pneumoniac worst, which I managed to ace somehow. I worked for this company from 1997-99, so it's going to be nice to go back.

Yes, I will be at Rhinebeck, with a surprise mystery guest. I'll be staying at the Quality Inn in Kingston--couldn't get into the Holiday Inn. My plans are to get to the hotel by 3 or 4 Friday afternoon, get settled, and then we'll see. Seems to me that I recall Mel is staying there also. Anyone else?

Now, I'll be wearing my Rhinebeck Bingo Square button on Saturday and Sunday. You've seen my picture in a previous entry so I'm not reprinting it. I have no idea what I'll be wearing. Probably jeans. Probably not a knitted thing, since last year it got much too warm by midday.

I don't know why it has to be a prerequisite to wear your handknits to these things anyway. Why is it that people wear Lopi ski sweaters when it's 75 degrees out? How fucking stupid is that? Suffer for your "art"? Or is that swelter for your ego?

I just bring the knitting bag when it's warm out. That suffices.

Oh yeah, and I will be bringing the Joy with me. For those of you who are interested, I will do an impromptu spinning clinic Saturday at 3 p.m. by the concession stands, if I can get a seat at one of the picnic tables. Please join me--bring your spindles, your wheels, whatever. Or just yourself.

Also, please don't hesitate to come up to me and say Hi. Meeting readers is great fun and I really am much nicer than Joe in person. He's the one who says that, not me.

So I want to see a roll call in the Comments--let me know if you're going to be there.

I will have my camera with me, so beware. I'll be doing a complete Rhinebeck photo essay for the blog.

You Asked, I'm Tellin'
So in lieu of any real fiber work this week, I'm falling back on the old answer-the-reader-questions route.

Yeah, it's a cop-out.

Kelly asks, When you say "tech writing position" what exactly is it that you do?

Besides drink a lot of coffee, well, a lot of stuff. In my current position, I edit badly written user manuals from Slovenia, rewrite marketing copy, handle print production. I was responsible for reviewing every document, whether written by Americans or Slovenians. In my new position, I will be writing Acceptance Test Procedures, Quality Test Procedures, As-Built Configurations and other valve-related beauties. Technical writers generally put into simplified English for end users what engineers and developers spew out in their documentation or release notes.

Like writing concise, accurate knitting directions--that's tech writing, OK?

LaurieM asks, So what are your criteria for a designer?

I think a true designer must have both engineering skills and artistic talent. Few do. As I have often posited here, I believe that most so-called designers are either engineers or artistic but not both. These days, I would nominate perhaps Veronik Avery, Shirley Paden and a few others who have both. Although that rather excludes Kaffe but he doesn't need to be a knitting engineer. His artistry is a rare exception.

I do call myself a Knitting Bionical insofar as I am good at plugging color and pattern together into a classic shape but not good at figuring out obfuscated knitting acrobatics. By and large, with perhaps EZ's Baby Surprise Jacket excluded, these knitting acrobatics generally result in a garment that you might gift Quasimodo with.

Topic for everyone: Who should avoid raglans and why? Discuss.

Well, time to get some laundry done. And then I'm off to see The Departed with JT. Such a rare and handy movie companion. Heh.